Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Twisted Christmas with Twisted Sister

Year: 2006
Genre: Hair Metal
Codec: MP3 320kBpS 44.1kHz

Review by James Christopher Monger
Holiday-themed albums need to either be pretty good, horrifically terrible, or completely original to cause even the jolliest head to turn. Twisted Christmas, a ten-track collection of yuletide classics from the band that once writhed atop a convertible singing the song "Burn in Hell" near the end of Pee Wee's Big Adventure, manages to achieve all three. Twisted Sister was always a group that would occasionally transcend their hair metal image with some truly majestic and powerful rock & roll, so it comes as no surprise that they filter the beloved Christmas carol through the same makeup-smeared sieve that brought the world "I Wanna Rock," "Wake Up the Sleeping Giant," and "The Prize." In fact, "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" sounds so much like a reimagining of "We're Not Gonna Take It," the listener can't help but become outraged at all of the injustice in the world. "Deck the Halls" sounds like a Ramones tune, "I'll Be Home for Christmas," featuring guest vocalist Lita Ford, could have launched a thousand lighters at any stadium in the late '80s, and the absolutely embarrassing "Heavy Metal Christmas" ("12 silver crosses, 11 black mascaras, ten pairs of platforms, nine tattered T-shirts, eight pentagrams, seven leather jackets, six cans of hair spray, five skullhead rings, four quarts of Jack, three studded belts, two pairs of spandex pants, and a tattoo of Ozzy") is almost impossible to turn off without seeing it through to its loathsome but charming end.
1 Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (Blane, Martin) 4:48
2 Oh Come All Ye Faithful (Traditional) 4:39
3 White Christmas (Berlin) 3:56
4 I'll Be Home for Christmas (Gannon, Kent, Ram) 4:08
5 Silver Bells (Evans, Livingston) 5:05
6 I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (Connor) 3:39
7 Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow (Cahn, Styne) 3:09
8 Deck the Halls (Traditional) 2:52
9 The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire) (Torme, Wells) 3:40
10 Heavy Metal Christmas (The Twelve Days of Christmas) (Snider, Traditional) 5:14
11 :36

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Blogger humppazoid said...

p/w is:

1:53 AM  

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